The Prodigal Brother

Jeff Peper
Written By Jeff Rybacki
 

I have been reading through Genesis with my family this month and have read through the account of Jacob & Esau. Their story of reconciliation, through no other means than the moving of God’s Spirit, I felt was worth some time expanding upon. If you’ve never read the story it exists in Genesis Chapters 25 through 33. There are a number of historical margins that I'm not exploring in this devotion with which you may want to acquaint yourself. 

Jacob & Esau were born twins, to Isaac & Rebekah, Isaac being the son of Abraham who was the fulfillment of God’s covenant with Abraham, the son through whom all nations will one day be blessed. We’re told that Esau was more loved by Isaac their father, and Jacob was more loved by Rebekah, their mother. No doubt this brought about plenty of tension in the home. 

As Jacob & Esau grow into young men, whatever quarrels they had boiled over in the events recorded in Chapter 27, when Rebekah and Jacob deliberately deceived Isaac and stole Esau’s birthright (his inheritance & blessing). Upon having his birthright stolen, Esau was understandably furious, and Jacob flees for his life. He goes to stay with relatives, where the tables turn and now he is deliberately deceived, but he marries and starts a family of his own. 

Eventually, as part of God’s covenant with Abraham, which is now extended to Jacob, God calls Jacob back to “the land of his kindred” and Jacob takes his family and all his possessions back with him. But there is unresolved conflict back in his hometown, and there’s someone that has been waiting decades for his return. Here we’ll pick up the narrative, and admittedly jump around a little bit. Again, read it for yourself. It's a great read!

Genesis 32:3 “And Jacob sent messengers before him to Esau his brother in the land of Seir, the country of Edom,…” 

To test the waters, Jacob sends out messengers ahead of him to see what’s happening with Esau, or to check the pulse of the situation. This was common in ancient times, when usually messengers were not at risk of being harmed so they could then report back to their master regarding the current state of affairs. Jacob was not comforted by what he heard. 

Genesis 32:6-7 “And the messengers returned to Jacob, saying, ‘We came to your brother Esau, and he is coming to meet you, and there are four hundred men with him.’ Then Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed.”

So now Esau knows Jacob is in town and is coming to meet him with four hundred men. Four hundred men are capable of covering great distances in a matter of days, while Jacob’s current party is loaded down with children, livestock, possessions, you name it. Jacob’s driving a U-Haul and someone’s coming for him in a Mustang. There’s no point in trying to flee. After a horrible night’s sleep (again read the whole story!), Jacob begins preparing for what the day will bring. 

Genesis 33:1, 3 “And Jacob lifted up his eyes and looked, and behold, Esau was coming, and four hundred men with him. So he divided the children among Leah and Rachel and the two female servants…. He himself went on before them, bowing himself to the ground seven times, until he came near to his brother.” 

Jacob was completely at Esau’s mercy. He makes some feeble preparations to send his family away and comes to his brother begging for mercy. Jacob has no choice but to check pride at the door and say, “I was wrong, please forgive me”, “I’ve sinned against you brother, please be merciful” or any other number of things that Jacob planned to say to Esau. But Esau never gives him the chance, the man who was so enraged last time he saw his brother, has had that rage replaced with adoration for his brother. 

Genesis 33:4-5 “But Esau ran to meet him and embraced him and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept. And when Esau lifted up his eyes and saw the women and children, he said, “Who are these with you?” Jacob said, “The children whom God has graciously given your servant.” 

Esau doesn’t wait for Jacob to arrive, and with his arms folded grants him forgiveness in some formal way in which Esau keeps all the relationship power for himself, in case he needs it in the future. But in a scene similar to the parable of the Prodigal son, Esau, like the father, sees someone precious to him and throws social convention out the window so he can run to him and embraces him. Esau had forgiven Jacob, likely not in that moment but long ago. There was no need to even ask forgiveness, because the work had already been completed. After a weeping heartfelt embrace, Esau gets the opportunity to meet a whole family that he was not sure even existed! 

One of the ways I think COVID has changed our lives the most is in our relationships. While our early plannings revolved around keeping people safe, in many ways our focus must now shift to view our relationships as just as delicate. Lack of social interaction has left us in silos in which we often only have our own side of the story or emotions to contemplate. 

I imagine some of you may not only find yourself in a similar situation as Jacob or Esau, but you may actually be BOTH Jacob & Esau. So where to go next?

If you’re the offender, if you’re in Jacob’s position, humble yourself to those you’ve offended. Just because Jacob was forgiven abundantly, doesn’t mean he deserved it. He deserved judgement, accountability, reparations, maybe even death. So, apologize for what you’ve done and ask for forgiveness. Don’t expect anything in return. You’ve already been granted all the forgiveness your life truly requires. There might be rejection, there might be someone who’s not ready to grant forgiveness yet. There might be challenging comments, you may need to endure hearing about wrongs you’ve not even realized and apologize for those as well. You can only affect your side of reconciliation. 

However, you may also find yourself in the position of Esau. Maybe someone has said bad things about you, maybe they’ve tried to undermine you, but now they realize what they’ve done. Don’t give them conditional forgiveness, give them your love and embrace. In fact, forgive them before they even ask for it. Weep with them and share in their joy of forgiveness. 

Prayer 

Heavenly Father, we fall short in so many ways in our relationships. We neglect them, we take them for granted, we think everyone ought to go about their day in the same way that we do and when they don’t, we feel justified in our anger. Lord, allow us to be humble, allow us to hold these things with an open hand and trust that you’re working all things together for Your glory. Allow us to forgive fully, and to not hold grudges against those who have done wrong things to us, whether consciously or unconsciously. As you instructed us in the manner of prayer, “and forgive us our debts, and we forgive our debtors.”


 
Jeff Rybacki
Previous

How Well Do We Really Love?
Next

What Is Love?